The Rational Part of The Mind VS The Addicted Part of The Mind

Last night I got in from a 3 hour sauna / ice bath session and was feeling amazing.

I checked my messages and saw that there was an opportunity to play in a Sunday morning 11-aside football match.

I had no other Sunday morning plans so decided to go for it. I'll be heading over to the game in about 20 minutes from now.

Yesterday, the team that I support, Sheffield Wednesday, played against Wrexham A.F.C.

We were losing 2-0, but we came back in the second half to draw 2-2. With all of this football at the front of my mind mind, it's a perfect time for me to reshare one of my favourite analogies.

The way that we teach things is that there are different players involved in addiction. We have the rational part of the mind, but we also have the addicted part of the mind. There is also a child self, but we won't get into that today. The rational part of the mind wants to stop watching porn. It knows it is costing you a lot. You probably have work, family, and other responsibilities to take care of. Meanwhile, the addicted part of the mind (APOTM) wants you to engage in your compulsive behaviour. The APOTM wants you to watch porn.

And as such, the APOTM will say anything it can to get you to relapse. It will say things like: "Once won't hurt".

"It doesn't count if it is just on Instagram"

"I am so stressed, I need to watch porn"

"I will just do it once because I'm hungover"

"I will start again tomorrow"

"I will have a quick peek, then stop"

"I've already messed up, may as well watch more"

And there will be countless other junkie thoughts and unanswerable questions too.

Now, what we do at the Beyond Compulsion Academy is quite simple. We start by training people, very in-depth, on the kind of thought patterns that lead people towards engaging in their compulsive behaviours.

We help people see the different players and start to counter these convincing junkie thoughts. Because the APOTM is so shrewd and relentless in it's pursuit of getting you to relapse, we make sure that we are proactive in taking back control.

Back to football for a moment now. For a lot of people, the APOTM is currently in possession. The APOTM is ruling people's lives with junkie thoughts and unanswerable questions. They are going on the internet to search for answers, but often they are told to avoid the APOTM by installing blockers, staying busy and removing triggers. Eventually, these people relapse and then have more junkie thoughts and unanswerable questions. Thoughts like: "Will I ever overcome this?" "What is wrong with me?"

"Why can't I quit?"

And other very deceptive, junkie thoughts like: "I don't even want to watch porn"

"I can't ever do this again"

"It just happened automatically"

Without the right education and training, many of these thought patterns go by without any scrutiny and the cycle continues on and on. Now if the opposition football team is already winning and is in possession of the football, the best place to start is by getting the football back.

Right now, for most people, the APOTM is in possession. Being passive doesn't work. This is why so many people eventually relapse. It is like they are just defending and defending and defending until the inevitable happens. Instead, here at the Beyond Compulsion Academy, we face the APOTM head on. We directly counter the junkie thoughts. We deal with the unanswerable questions. We seize the urges as an opportunity to rewire the brain and take back control.

We do things dramatically differently to most conventional approaches. And as such, we get dramatically different results. We help people feel empowered, in control, and free. As a previous Sheffield Wednesday manager once said "Attack is the best form of defence".