When you learn the Beyond Compulsion method in-depth, you begin to see the world differently and start to speak a different language to most people.

In my porn addiction days I was always looking for an immediate cure. Just one piece of information to take all the pain away. I searched and searched.

When you use the Beyond Compulsion method to live your life free of engaging in compulsivity, you start to think about things very differently.

For years, I trained my brain to get used to being constantly busy. I was doing my best to stop watching porn. I didn't know what else to do so I'd keep running and running from my own mind.

This year, my New Year's resolution is paradoxically about being more present. I want to be focused on the right now, at this moment, more.

You would not put your hands in fire, but if you are still addicted to porn - you are choosing to burn your brain with a screen. Not literally, but that is how it feels.

In just a few days time, a new year will be upon us, and so one kind of junkie thought you can expect to hear over the upcoming days is along the lines of "I will start again in the new year".

Most guys we work with have been stuck in a porn addiction for decades. They feel trapped, out of control, and often stuck. I once felt like this too so I know what it is like.

You can consume countless hours of content on addiction recovery. But, there will always come to the inevitable moment of compulsive desire. What do you actually choose in that exact moment that you want to engage in a compulsive behaviour?

When you are in a porn addiction, you masturbate to sexual content on a screen. You look at stuff which doesn't align with who you really are. You get out of control. You don't fully trust yourself. And as such, your self-respect is in the bin.

I would have spent hours on Netflix, YouTube, and eventually ended up looking at sexual content and relapsing. I would have felt tons of regret, shame, and spiralled into thoughts like "I can't go on nights out anymore or I will get out of control."

When you are struggling with porn addiction, you often feel helpless...

When I was in a porn addiction, I put porn on a pedestal. This is natural.

Last night I spoke to one of our first clients. He joined the Beyond Compulsion Academy around a year and a half ago. He's now stopped the behaviour for over 16 months.

This week, a new client shared that it has been one of the happiest weeks of his life. He had been stuck trying to find a solution to his problem with porn for years, but finally he now knows exactly what to do at all times.

Last night, I spent over 3 hours in the podcast studio. We had a big BCA group call (record number of guys on it) and then I went straight to playing football. The football game was with some guys I haven't played with before and it was pretty terrible. We ended up playing for an extra 20 minutes and so I didn't get home until around 9. I cooked, ate, facetimed my partner for a bit and chilled out on my sofa. But, I felt very awake from such a busy day and from playing fo

Yesterday, someone got in touch with me who didn't feel he was addicted to porn, but felt like it was a real problem in his life. I have been exactly there myself. I get it. There can be a lot of unhelpful stigma around "porn addiction" and many misconceptions too.

A lot of people don't expect to have any desires and then are hit out of nowhere by strong compulsive desires. And it is right there that people face a problem. Porn addiction is not a problem when you have no desires. It is a problem when you do have desires.

When I was in a porn addiction, I found it hard to focus on one task at a time. I jumped from activity to activity and would give myself constant breaks to scroll on social media or have a snack. And often I'd end up watching porn and masturbating too. My focus was terrible.

Whether you feel a lot of shame around your porn use or not, you will eventually experience the inevitable moment of compulsive desire. This is that exact moment where you want to go ahead and engage in your compulsive behaviour.