When I was stuck in a porn addiction, I'd relapse and experience a wave of different emotions over the following days. I'd feel frustrated, angry at myself and full of shame. I'd feel low, disconnected, and feel disgusted by myself.
But, then there'd usually come a time where I'd feel motivated. I'd had enough and wanted change. But, that motivation never lasted long. It felt exhausting.
I was tired of keeping up with all the things I felt I needed to do to "not look at porn".
I was agitated, stressed and restless. Eventually, I'd inevitably experience compulsive desire again and my motivation would pop like a balloon and I'd relapse once again.
If you are not feeling good about staying stopped, aware of all the tricks the addicted part of the mind is playing on you and countering these correctly - it's going to feel like hard work. And the impact of that hard work of trying "not to watch porn" is going to bleed over into many areas of your life.
You'll have less capacity and space to live the life you really want.
Real mental freedom is the goal. Being totally in control of yourself is the goal. Feeling like you can do whatever the hell you want, without worrying about relapsing, is the goal. And all of this is 100% possible when you change your thinking and have a tool to deal with every compulsive desire correctly.